What is Communication?
Communication issues can develop in any circumstance or social relationship. It can be easy for individuals to misunderstand or misinterpret others, and these misunderstandings may lead to arguments or tension in personal, platonic, or professional relationships. One of the most distressing realities for many couples is learning that they are not able to communicate effectively. Since communication is the foundation of a thriving relationship, couples that address the problem have a great opportunity to build a lasting bond
Signs & Symptoms
Communication issues can stem from both emotional and psychological issues from early childhood relationships, previous romantic relationships, or other areas of life. Here are some examples of issues that can lead to communication problems:
- Unresolved baggage from youth - A frequent cause of misunderstanding in relationships is unresolved baggage from youth. Examples of baggage from youth include preconceived ideas and experiences regarding sexuality, the proper way to raise children, how you relate to and handle money, and self-esteem issues.
- Unfulfilled expectations - We often have preconceived expectations of what marriage and relationships are supposed to be like. The biggest problem with expectations in general is that we may know what our expectations are, but it unlikely that our partner does! It is your job to learn to fill yourself up and then offer all you can to the relationship.
- Sex and Intimacy - Sex is one of the most common areas of conflict in many relationships. Chronic disappointment and dashed expectations can manifest in a serious loss of intimacy in a relationship. If there is a lack of intimacy with regard to the basic friendship in the relationship, it is also expressed (or not!) in some manner in the bedroom.
- Resentments - It is critical in the treatment of relationships to uncover these often unknown or unspoken resentments. The focus is not on how the other person needs to change, but rather on what you can do to change yourself. Resentments often build as a direct result of a person's inability to communicate their needs and/or take responsibility for them in the first place.
- Infidelity – Affairs are often used as a way to lick one's wounds, to escape from the difficulties of the current relationship, or to abandon the responsibility we have to work on the troubles in our relationships. Relationships can heal from this most devastating of betrayals, but full responsibility, remorse and true commitment to self-development must be the foundation for the healing.
Diagnosis & Treatment Options
Marriage counseling is designed to give you guidance in any area of your relationship where you are feeling doubt, uncertainty, or hesitation. If you and your partner are not able to express your thoughts and feelings in a productive way, counseling will also give you the space and freedom to do that. Marriage counseling can help improve communication issues and relationship problems by:
- Changing the views of the relationship. Marriage counseling attempts to help both partners see the relationship in a more objective manner. Therapy focuses on altering the way the relationship is understood, so the couple can start to see each other, and their interactions, in more adaptive ways.
- Modifying dysfunctional behavior. Effective marriage counseling tries to change the way that the partners actually behave with each other. This means that in addition to helping them improve their interactions, therapists also ensures that their clients are not engaging in actions that can cause physical, psychological, or economic harm.
- Decreasing emotional avoidance. Couples who avoid expressing their private feelings put themselves at greater risk of becoming emotionally distant and growing apart. Effective marriage counseling helps their clients bring out the emotions and thoughts that they cannot effectively express to the other person.
- Improving communication. Marriage counseling focuses on helping the partners to communicate more effectively. Couples may require coaching to learn how to speak to each other in more supportive and understanding ways, as well as to learn how how to listen more actively and empathically.
- Promoting strengths. Marriage counseling points out the strengths in the relationship and build resilience, particularly as therapy nears a close. The point of promoting strength is to help the couple derive more enjoyment out of their relationship.
There Is Hope!
If your relationship is suffering from communication problems, marriage counseling can help! Call our office today to set up an appointment, or visit these websites for more information.